I don’t know where to start. The pain is so unreal.
For a long time I was so comfortable, so safe and I felt so protected from everything. I did something I hadn’t done for a long time, I relaxed. I trusted you when you told me that I could have trusted you.
I guess that’s how the devil works. Pulls you in, feeds you the sweetest lies and then leaves you hanging.
Day by day I felt you becoming a part of me. I swallowed so many emotions and feelings because I wanted to be what you described as the completion of your world.
I wanted to be to you what no one else was to me, the missing piece to a puzzle. But I ignored the obvious because that’s what people do when they want something so badly right?
You were bitter from the start, an angry man left to lick his own wounds, a man that felt it was him against the world but yet still a child fighting for closure.
I was attracted to you because beneath all of the agony and hatred, was a man that I could have seen myself with. It didn’t matter how often I saw that person, just that I knew he was lurking around.
But there I go looking to save everyone. When will I realize not everyone is meant to be saved and sometimes you just have to look out for yourself? After all no one will love you like you can.
2 tears in a bucket later, I think it’s time to learn my lesson. You’re nowhere around and you didn’t have the decency to be honest with someone that gave you honesty and more.
Thanks to you, I’m empty. Filled with nothing but exhaustion. How long will people be dishonest with others and mostly themselves? When will people realize beneath everything, all we have is our heart? I’m positive it’s not meant to take as much lambasting as it does.
Not even the words that fill this post can describe how I feel or the emotion that’s stewing in me.
So much for trying…