Sorry I’ve been out of touch lately, but I had to come back and bless you with something that’s been constantly on my mind.

You know the situations where men don’t want a relationship but want all the perks of a relationship? The ones where they say, they’re dating around to find the right one or some want to have fun but expect you to act like the unofficial girlfriend to their unofficial relationship? Yeah, I’ve been there about twice and you’d think I’d learn from the first one, but it’s all good, I’ve learned finally and I want to share with you what NOT to do. Keep in mind all these things I’ve done because I didn’t want to play games, I wanted to show them I was serious but in the end it made me angry as hell because I wasted time on people that weren’t worth my time from the start.

  1. Don’t cook him anything: If you’re not good enough to be a girlfriend, he’s not good enough to eat from you. It may seem cold, but most of us women can throw down in the kitchen and we go all out when we care about you, that’s too much effort in itself. So if you’re with someone who doesn’t want to make it official, STOP feeding him. Allow his mother to feed him. He is not your child.
  2. Don’t go out your way: Listen, I’m a really nice person. I do things for people I like all the time. My friends can get anything out of me. But realize what I said friends, this man is not your friend. Ya’ll are only cool because ya’ll like each other. If you didn’t like him or he didn’t like you, the chances of you being friends wouldn’t exist. I had a dude that could call me and ask me for a favor at anytime even if it put me out of my way, I went because I’d like to think he’d do it for me. Strange thing is when we were dating, my house became too far for him after a few months but his was ideal for me. Right.
  3. Save your money: Every time I’d be leaving my house to come to him, he was always hungry. I used to spend more on his food than mine. Maybe he would have done it for me, but gad damn you’re a grown man why the hell can’t you cook for yourself? Then when I was done with him, I’d hear stories about women who’d buy him items that cost more than my food, even though he told them he wasn’t interested. Nah bruh, SAVE YOUR MONEY.
  4. Don’t Sleep-Over: Sleep overs and movie nights and taco nights are meant for girlfriends. If he wants a sleep over lend him some of your teddy bears so he doesn’t feel lonely. Stack them up real nice, so it can feel as if a real person is there and leave. He’ll get the point.

Men are selfish creatures as women can be as well. If they don’t want something instead of withdrawing from it, they will continuously take whatever you’re giving and will give back as much as they feel it takes to keep you happy. Please in peas and carrots name, do not allow any man to do this to you.

If he isn’t certain he wants a relationship, give him an unofficial friend and the worst kind. Don’t be the friend that will go out of their way to do favors, or to make sure they’re okay, or to cook food and spoil them. No, save that  for your man.

Any man that wants to be with you, will go through tornadoes and hurricanes to be with you. Nothing will stop them. Be the beautiful and intelligent woman that God made you to be and treat yourself better than that. Don’t allow anyone to make you settle for what they want all because you want them!

Love you guys, I’ll be back with “Men don’t encourage foolishness” tonight!

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