I’ve never believed in love at first sight or even like at first sight. But this weekend I’ve got to tell you, nature or love has made a believer of me.

I met him. He is the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen. I wanted to put him in a trophy case to admire him. If forever was all I had it wouldn’t be enough. His personality matched it as well. Perfect gentleman, honest about his life and his past. Everything checked out. The only problem is I’m being beaten with the same woman stick.

He seems to have been through everything other than death. He tells me he wants to make it work but I won’t be faithful to him. It was then tears ALMOST came to my eyes.

After all I’ve been through, all the tears I’ve cried and lessons I’ve learned why am I being beaten with someone else’s stick? And you can’t blame them, it’s everyone’s fault. We callously play with everyone’s feelings and emotions without thinking of their reaction. We always put ourselves first not realizing the hearts that depend on us or the love people have invested in us.

I won’t lie, I’ve made decisions purely based on how I felt but that’s how life is, we are made to decide for us. At the end of the day we know what we’ve been through and what we can sustain.

But through it all I don’t think I’ve ever made someone pay for what someone else has done. He told me that I won’t love him because he’s going to love me beyond my means and I won’t submit. The only thing I can say is, “okay.” Because you’re telling me what I won’t do based on what someone else did to you, that’s far from fair.

If you’re not willing to let me show you that I’m not like her, I can’t even entertain your existence.

It hurts but like everything else, life goes on.

Love ya’ll xoxo