There are two seemingly mandatory questions that a man must ask you once you say that you are single.

  1. Why?
  2. When last have you got “some”?

The second question is in fact my moot focus today.

Being single and being asked when last you had sex is always an interesting time. In some cases, the men that ask single ladies that immediately find themselves experiencing an erection when she utters phrases such as “Lil while now” or “Can’t remember” or even “Couple months ago”.

Usually following this, men are unable to even complete the conversation, as they have already contorted you into positions unseen in a Kama Sutra handbook, simply because you are blowing the horn on dry dock.  This is the part I find most hilarious, and the reason why can be summed up in the following 5 words:

“Not all penis makes sense”.

Allow me to elaborate. For some reason, men feel as though once you are on dry dock, and they have a penis, you are to be bestowed with the honor of resetting your “Length of Time Since You Had Sex Clock”, and proving that they can indeed slide something in and out of a crevice in your body.

Unfortunately, this is not the case simply because not all penis makes sense. While men have different girls for different reasons, women have different cocks for different reasons. For example, there is the one that can eat good but may be lacking in the intercourse area. Or perhaps the sensitive penis that likes to cuddle afterwards. Even still, the hammer of Thor that can make heavens open and the angels sing. Men may not realize that just because they have a penis, it does not mean that they will attain the cervix.

If a woman is on dry dock, 8 times out of 10 she wants to be there.  Pause. Please allow that to sink in. If every straight man is willing to provide penis whenever it may be desired, why would a woman be on dry dock? Think about it.

Now, a female may be on dry dock for a variety of reasons:

  1. The penis she wants is with someone else.
  2. The penis she tried was mediocre and a waste of time.
  3. The PVC she got new batteries for is completing the task until Iron can be attained.
  4. She’s holding out in the hope of getting a man.
  5. The penis she had is no longer interested.

And the list goes on and on…

And just because she permitted you to partake in the breaking of her bread before, what makes you think she wants you to again?  Yeah you had it before, but if you don’t get hit with that “Call-back” like an interview, chances are she would prefer to buy double A batteries than fake an orgasm with your mediocre jook again.

So fellas, next time you get excited about hearing she is on dry dock, realize that this may not be an open invitation for you to wine inna her hole. Think back to the last time she dialed your number, and decide within your own heart for yourself…

Does your penis make sense?